I give to you a story in eleventy-one words...
Tess greeted Susan and suggested, “Let’s set up your device.”
After a few false starts with passwords, Tess asked, “Do you use Siri?”
“Yes, though it’s a real pain.”
Tess chuckled. “First, say ‘Hey Siri.’ Then, make a request.” Another shopper interrupted, and Tess moved away from the table.
“Hey Siri.” No response. “Hey Siri!” Still nothing. Susan tried at least ten more times, to no avail.
When Tess returned, Susan grumbled, “It isn’t working,”
“Your Siri must be cranky. I have an idea.”
“Please, I’ll try anything.”
“Say ‘Hey Siri, I’m sorry.’”
“Why?”
“Just try it.”
Susan spoke reluctantly, “Hey Siri, I’m sorry.”
Siri replied. “For what? Please be specific.”
Wednesday, December 25, 2019
Wednesday, December 18, 2019
Duck
I give to you a poem in eleventy-one words...
“I’ve a duck,” he proclaimed, “for Christmas day.”
“A duck, do you say? Why buy it today?
‘Tis but the fifth; why tease me with fowl…”
(A passing grimace did his face betray.)
“When twenty long days have we to delay?”
“I’ve many glad notions ‘bout what I’ll do,
Like boil or bake it or toss it in stew.”
Ere he the fowl in the freezer stuffed
And fled the kitchen with plenty ado.
I meanwhile snacked on a roasted cashew.
Upon reentry he said not a word
Neither greeting nor mention of the bird.
My last bid to embrace him proved a bust;
As he scampered away, I stood nonplussed.
“I’ve a duck,” he proclaimed, “for Christmas day.”
“A duck, do you say? Why buy it today?
‘Tis but the fifth; why tease me with fowl…”
(A passing grimace did his face betray.)
“When twenty long days have we to delay?”
“I’ve many glad notions ‘bout what I’ll do,
Like boil or bake it or toss it in stew.”
Ere he the fowl in the freezer stuffed
And fled the kitchen with plenty ado.
I meanwhile snacked on a roasted cashew.
Upon reentry he said not a word
Neither greeting nor mention of the bird.
My last bid to embrace him proved a bust;
As he scampered away, I stood nonplussed.
Monday, December 9, 2019
Weights
I give to you a story in eleventy-one words...
Doug slid weights onto each side of the barbell, then sat to start his second set.
A silver-haired woman lurked nearby, eager to speak. She inched toward him; her eyes searched Doug’s for acknowledgment.
Startled, Doug removed his headphones in wary anticipation.
“Will you put these weights away?” The rebuke smoldered behind her poorly masked curiosity.
Eyebrows furrowed, he drawled, “Sure.” His intonation rose at the word’s conclusion as if he, himself, wasn’t convinced.
“Well, people don’t.” She harrumphed and slunk away, though continued to monitor him.
When Doug completed his final set, he felt her probing eyes but didn’t meet them. Instead, he scanned the gym with an amused expression.
Doug slid weights onto each side of the barbell, then sat to start his second set.
A silver-haired woman lurked nearby, eager to speak. She inched toward him; her eyes searched Doug’s for acknowledgment.
Startled, Doug removed his headphones in wary anticipation.
“Will you put these weights away?” The rebuke smoldered behind her poorly masked curiosity.
Eyebrows furrowed, he drawled, “Sure.” His intonation rose at the word’s conclusion as if he, himself, wasn’t convinced.
“Well, people don’t.” She harrumphed and slunk away, though continued to monitor him.
When Doug completed his final set, he felt her probing eyes but didn’t meet them. Instead, he scanned the gym with an amused expression.
Sunday, December 1, 2019
Jingle Bells
I give to you a story in eleventy-one words...
Celia started singing Jingle Bells. After a few words, she and her family transformed the restaurant into a festive wonderland.
Ted, the restaurant’s manager approached with a stern expression; Andrew, the girl’s father, stood.
“You are bothering the customers.”
“But everyone’s singing. Don’t worry, we’ll tip well.” Andrew motioned to sit, but Ted grabbed his arm.
“Don’t touch me.”
“She needs to stop.”
“Or what?”
“You’ll get thrown out.”
“Try it.”
“Excuse me?”
Andrew turned. Ted grabbed him again. Andrew reflexively threw a punch that put him on the floor.
The song stopped. Everyone and everything, except Andrew, disappeared.
Gas hissed causing Andrew to collapse. “Prep him for the next trial.”
Celia started singing Jingle Bells. After a few words, she and her family transformed the restaurant into a festive wonderland.
Ted, the restaurant’s manager approached with a stern expression; Andrew, the girl’s father, stood.
“You are bothering the customers.”
“But everyone’s singing. Don’t worry, we’ll tip well.” Andrew motioned to sit, but Ted grabbed his arm.
“Don’t touch me.”
“She needs to stop.”
“Or what?”
“You’ll get thrown out.”
“Try it.”
“Excuse me?”
Andrew turned. Ted grabbed him again. Andrew reflexively threw a punch that put him on the floor.
The song stopped. Everyone and everything, except Andrew, disappeared.
Gas hissed causing Andrew to collapse. “Prep him for the next trial.”
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